I felt the need to write this article after reading a Canta (University of Canterbury students') magazine where the feature story included candid quotes from a survey of students' best and worst sexual experiences. I'm in my 60s and it was immediately clear sex today was very different to the 1970s. For example, one woman's story ended in Emergency with a serious anal tear, described as "funny in retrospect LOL". That didn't sound funny at all.

Another recent story which disturbed many and raised questions about Internet influencers was the Auckland death of 22-year-old British tourist Grace Millane, invited to a hotel room by her murderer after joining an online forum about bondage. We are moving into a period where relationships and sexual norms are being reshaped by Websites whose only aim is to create large profits.

Porn Industry: Negative & Unrealistic View Of Sex

Back when I was aged 20, ignorance was pretty normal, so we expected to learn from our experiences. Of course I'm not saying ignorance was good. But at least when two people got together they figured out how that worked for themselves. Does anybody out there want to claim that today's porn industry is helping us have a positive and realistic view of sex?

Anyway, this article is not about opinions. These cases are just to highlight the social changes and some associated risks, and I'll move on to look at research and highlight a few conclusions. First though, here are a few more personal stories to explain why I took on this rather unusual article for Watchdog and to raise a few more related issues.

First story: even in the 1970s there were of course sexist influences in our lives. I briefly lived in a flat where one guy modelled his lifestyle on Playboy's Hugh Hefner, including wandering the flat in a plush bathrobe and doing his best to attract a series of young women into his bed. Second story: I also learned later that Playboy-style key parties were popular in my parents' neighbourhood when I was young (though not with my parents). House keys were thrown in a bowl and men went home at the end of the night with the women whose keys they picked out. I wonder if this seemed such a good idea in the early morning when an upset child visited the parental bed.

Third story: 20 plus years ago I visited a friend in Sydney and their partner had an unusual suggestion for the evening - would I mind if we stayed in and watched porn? She had a deadline for her project researching consent and coercion in Australian pornography. I'm always interested in how the world works, so that's what we did.

Our task was to watch together a selection of these movies and spot any moments where the actors were being coerced into doing something they didn't want to do. You might assume that actors in porn are making their own choices and getting well paid for it. But after that night it was clear to us all that in each of our randomly selected movies, we saw moments of coercion, typically about unsafe and unprotected sex.

There's a clear difference in the interests of the porn funder/makers and the desires and health of the actors. Reality isn't a saleable fantasy, and extremes mean more dollars. There's much more money sloshing around the legal side of today's porn world, a US-led industry worth $US97 billion a year. The objectification of women and gay men, unrealistic body expectations, and the promotion of extreme behaviours continues.

Fourth story: about 15 years ago I was working in a large Australian government department. All our work was on computers by then, and systematic monitoring became available to management through tools that scanned all image files to identify nudity. This was back in the day when porn meant images of course, whereas today it's mostly film. One day we all received an email along the lines that storing or sharing pornography was prohibited, and non-compliance could cost you your job. Fair enough, we all want a safe workplace. Acknowledging these notifications became part of our daily system login.

But here's the odd part. A couple of months later we heard that all our temporary Indigenous staff were terminated. There'd been a network sharing inappropriate content led by older permanent staff, who kept their jobs. All our younger Indigenous staff, on a programme we'd provided extra support and training to, were dismissed because they were on temporary contracts with no recourse.

Yet no-one from management had ever sat down in front of any of these staff to warn them in person. The computer system provided automated warnings and confirmed their acknowledgement, which was deemed enough for termination back then. I hope today you'd need more than this to take away a job and undermine a career. I raised these process and fairness issues at the time but managers weren't interested. I was left feeling uncomfortable, like I was defending pornography.

Fifth story: About ten years back I had a prostatectomy in an Australian public hospital to remove early-stage prostate cancer. The side effects include varying degrees of erectile dysfunction and urinary incontinence, depending on the success of surgery. The surgery went well but there was no after-care, so I saw a private sexual health doctor. This was an interesting experience. He was very professional, very straightforward, but also very efficient (time is money). He recommended and provided a drug for self-injection into the penis which gives a strong erection. The point is to get the anatomy working again through drugs, then withdraw them over time as the body returns to normal.

It certainly works, but I did have the classic experience of injecting too much one time, forcing me to walk into Emergency while trying to hide a large and painful erection to get another drug that reduces it. That's a story I'm happy to share and laugh about in retrospect. No harm done, and I'd been warned of the risk in advance.

But the link to this article is the doctor's second recommendation, viewing pornography to assist the return of stronger erections. Looking back, perhaps this had a place, but it does nothing to encourage the open discussion needed with partners at difficult times like this. This is a theme you will also see in the research on porn which follows. Sixth story: My partner's son has lived in Japan for 30 years and has many surprising stories about cultural differences. Japan is still a very patriarchal society, and many men have no qualms about watching porn on their phones in public, or groping young women on crowded trains.

Sexual Diversity And Openness Today

Before looking at pornography specifically, it's worth taking a look at the range of perspectives on sexuality which are out in public today. Ponsonby Women's Bookshop staff book reviews are one way to highlight these changes. I've grouped their recommendations-list for 2024 into themes below, with a short summary of each book. Together, they tell a story about both modern sexual diversity but also the societal pressures which continue to impact women and LGBTQIA+ people.

Theme 1, books on sexual enjoyment:
"Come Together: The Science (And Art) Of Creating Lasting Sexual Connections" (for long term couples; UK)
"Slow Sex: The Art And Craft Of The Female Orgasm" (slow down, connect emotionally for female sexual satisfaction; UK)
"More Orgasms Please" (Hotbed Collective, from their chat-style podcast; UK)
"Girl Sex 101" (satisfying sex guide; US)
"The Wonder Down Under: A User's Guide To The Vagina" (medical educators' guide to dispelling myths; Norway)
"Sex: The School Of Life" (overcoming shame, understanding desires; UK)
"Best Women's Erotica Of The Year, Volume 5" (collected sex stories by published authors; UK)
"Anonymous Sex" (anonymous erotic stories from international authors)
"Respect: A Guy's Guide To Sex, Love And Consent" (discussion of consent, body image, sexual identify etc; Sweden)

Theme 2, sexual diversity:
"Come As You Are" (we are all different, but we are all normal; UK)
"More: A Memoir Of Open Marriage" (dating sites, flings, sex in public places, therapy, "becoming her most authentic self"; US)
"The Ethical Slut, Third Edition: A Practical Guide To Polyamory, Open Relationships, And Other Freedoms In Sex And Love" (beyond monogamy; UK)
"Ace: What Asexuality Reveals About Desire, Society And The Meaning Of Sex" (stories and social analysis; UK)

Theme 3, sexual politics & therapy:
"Consent Laid Bare: Sex, Entitlement & The Distortion Of Desire" (girls' and women's personal stories of their most negative sexual experiences; Australia)
"Sex Talk: A Feminist Discussion Of Sexual Empowerment" (sexual variety, self-discovery, pleasure and self-esteem; UK)
"Fix The System, Not The Women" (systemic prejudice; UK)
"Hood Feminism: Notes From The Women White Feminists Forgot" (basic survival is a feminist issue, not elite equality; US)
"Feminism For The 99%: A Manifesto" (anti-capitalist, eco-socialist, anti-racist feminism; UK)
"Porn: An Oral History" (longer conversations about porn today; UK)
"The Porn Trap: The Essential Guide To Overcoming Problems Caused By Pornography" (therapists guide to healing strategies; US)

Porn Statistics

Next, here's an objective statistical look at the pornography industry, so we start with a better picture of exactly what we're talking about:

4% of the entire Internet is porn
35% of all Internet downloads are related to porn
US produces 24% of global porn, UK, Germany & Brazil 5%, France & Russia 4% (Yahoo Finance)
Global porn was worth $US97 billion in 2023 (statistics c- earthweb.com)
Xvideos, Pornhub and XNXX had 21 billion visits per month (statista.com February 2024)
Global population is 8.1 billion (worldometers.info)

Usage is highest 10pm-1am and Tuesdays, above average in pm work hours (Pornhub Insights)
Most popular male search categories are Japanese, mature, anal, MILF, ebony
Most popular female categories are lesbian, Japanese, threesome, ebony, mature
Female viewing is higher than men only in the Philippines, most male in Egypt and Germany (74%)
Phones deliver 91% of all porn traffic; phone dominance is consistent across all countries
Usage is highest for 18-24-year-olds and declines with age

Porn Research

Finally, here's a summary of the best 2024 research papers on pornography, to provide some reliable evidence on porn's impacts (from ResearchGate): Consumption of Pornography Online: "Using passively collected browsing data ... we find ... a small number of users consuming lots of pornography and most consuming small amounts ... 32% of (US) respondents consumed pornography online during the month".

Pornography Use and Sexual Coercion: "sexual scripts adopted from pornography and investment in pornography use are significantly related to self-reported sexual coercion". "Do I Really Need To Ask?": Relationship Between Pornography and Sexual Consent: "participants who don't watch pornography have more positive attitudes towards sexual consent and those that watch pornography every day tend to feel more uncomfortable asking or giving sexual consent".

Associations Between Pornography Use Frequency and Intimate Partner Violence Perpetration Among Young Adult Couples: A 2-Year Longitudinal Study: "Pornography use frequency at Time 1 was related to higher sexual coercion perpetration two years later and to their partner's lower pornography use". Pornography Use and Sexual Objectification of Others: "Greater pornography use is associated with greater sexual objectification of others, across a variety of content categories".

Pornography and Sexual Dysfunction: "28 studies were identified ... women were more likely to show positive associations between pornography use and sexual functioning whereas men showed mixed results. Specifically, the analysis demonstrated the diversity of outcomes of pornography use, including how they currently play out differently for women and men and for non-problematic and problematic users ... this latter group - particularly when male - more likely to show mild to moderate negative associations with sexual functioning".

Pornography consumption and sexual satisfaction in Brazilian adults: "Men report use for excitement, avoidance of uncomfortable feelings, and boredom. Among women, use involves sexual activity with a partner, curiosity and learning different practices. The violent pornography consumption score was a predictor of lower levels of emotional sexual satisfaction".

Pornography diversity in committed relationships: "those who generally abstained from pornography were often older and in longer relationships ... those who abstained from pornography use both individually and with their romantic partner generally reported the best individual and relational well-being ... individuals who generally avoided pornography but had romantic partners who regularly used pornography, were the most likely to report the lowest individual well-being and relationship quality".

Exploratory Findings on US Adolescents' Pornography Use, Dominant Behaviour, and Sexual Satisfaction: "Youth with greater exposure to pornography are more likely to engage in sexually dominant behaviours, distancing them from their partners, and reducing their sense of sexual satisfaction". Adolescents' pornography viewing frequency and its relationship with condom attitudes:

"A substantial proportion of adolescents (42%, aged 13-18) in our sample viewed pornography and those who view more frequently had more negative condom attitudes". Pornography associated with youth violence: "The use of pornography and addiction to it (in Veracruz, Mexico) facilitate the presence of physical and verbal violence, anger, hostility and violence in general in moderate or greater intensity, as well as severe physical violence".

Problematic pornography use and mental health status among adolescents of Bangladesh: "This study found significant relationship with problematic pornography use and mental health status of Bangladeshi adolescents". Parent-child conversations about pornography: "Parents consistently report being worried about the impact of online pornography on their adolescent and pre-adolescent children's development. Yet, most parents do not discuss pornography as part of parent-child conversations about sexuality".

Guidance On Pornography And Children

For those who are concerned about pornography's effect on their children, I've included this longer piece of evidence-based advice (European Union [EU] knowledge-base on children and youth in the digital age): "What is the role of parents when it comes to adolescent pornography use and sexting? Teenage sexting is the practice of exchanging nude or semi-nude images of oneself among peers. Most researchers recognise consensual sexting as a common expression of sexual intimacy in the digital age. We need to distinguish between consensual sexting, which they should be free to explore, and non-consensual sexting, from which they need protection".

"Most parents (in Germany) explicitly want comprehensive sexuality education for their children. They understand that sexual knowledge is important to promote sexual health and well-being and to combat risks. More parents than ever before are talking to their children about sex. Experts agree that both parents and teachers often need training on how to address these issues with their teens in a helpful way. If adolescents feel judged or blamed for their sexual experiences and problems, they will learn to keep quiet. This is the most dangerous lesson of all."

"Where do you see the greatest need for action when it comes to pornography, young people and their safety and sexual well-being? Focusing 2024's (EU) Safer Internet Day on pornography is a step in the right direction. Digital pornography is here to stay. Teens are curious and will always find a way to access sexually explicit digital content. The opportunities and challenges of sexual media content are manageable. But an open debate is needed".

"Teens can only open up about their sexual questions, insecurities, bad experiences and fears if they can trust that adults will not blame or punish them for their natural curiosity and exploration. Digital platforms need to take more effective action to intervene and prevent the spread of hate speech, digital sexual harassment and virtual violence, such as non-consensual sharing of self-produced intimate images or deep fake porn. Perpetrators of virtual sexual violence must also be held criminally accountable in a more consistent manner".

Conclusions

In reading through all this research, the big-picture conclusions in relation to pornography seemed to be: (1) Only a small proportion had problematic use i.e. excessive, compulsive and affecting relationships (2) But for non-problematic users, there are still associations with lower sexual happiness, lower awareness of consent, increased risk of violence and reduced willingness to use condoms (3) Usage is age-related, declining as people mature.

So, most young people will view pornography, but leave it behind with age. But after getting a bit more informed on this little-discussed topic, I remain concerned about the social impact of pornography. Research reassures that the impacts are limited, so far - but the mega-trends affecting this corner of our lives are all bad.

Today's large corporations are effectively beyond regulation. They are investing in mining more of our personal data, improving their algorithms to increase our addiction, and deliberately targeting children. Those producing and distributing porn are male-centric, reinforcing male dominance and encouraging extreme behaviour, objectification and personal disengagement through their products.

Like neoliberalism, this is not a recipe for a happier or more equal future. The question is, what should be done? My general feeling is we have seen some of the complex consequences and limits of State prohibition during covid. There are political costs when the State wields its power, and we need all the support we can get for a well-funded and publicly-popular Government to tackle corporate craziness and global warming. So, in conclusion, a greater emphasis on increasing State expertise, plus levying the online porn industry to fund research, public education and debate may be the way to go.

Watchdog - 166 August 2024